Just Listening

I watch the Office regularly. Unfortunately, tonight there are severe weather warnings all over the area, and my show kept getting interrupted. I missed most of it as a result. However, they "resumed programming" just in time for the closing credits. As I was getting ready to change the channel, ER abruptly started, and I was pleasantly surprised to here my cousin's song playing on the clock radio in the show. I'm sure its one of those things that if you aren't listening for it, or don't know it, you won't recognize it. About a month ago, a different song of her's was on Grey's Anatomy, and that played for much longer.

I often try and think from her perspective. I don't know her too well, but what I do know is she loves what she does, she is extremely talented, and very humble. To do well in the UK is great, but that's really just a springboard for the US.

This is probably the tipping point. Its easy to have dreams of success and fame, but somewhere along the line it has to become a job if you're getting paid. To get the US market means a lot, but her life is already promotions and shows. A larger market would only make it worse... and then the humble lifestyle and life lessons that made the music as good/likable/relatable as it is, is gone. The life that created the music is so drastically changed that one can argue whether or not the same person is even there. At that point, does the artist see music as an honest expression, or a means to a paycheck? My hope for her is that she doesn't change, and continues to grace us with her honest expressions of the world and life.

~JL

Just in the Routine

I'm getting into the routine. I didn't want to talk about it too early in case things fall off, but I started going to the gym again on Sunday. I ran an entire mile, then called it quits. My strategy, since it was pretty tiring, is to run 1/2 mile every day for the rest of the week. Today, I decided that this is working out fine, since it is day 4 now, and I have been sticking to the planned routine. On Sunday, I ran the first 1/2 mile, walked for .3 and ran for the last .2. Yesterday and today I ran the 1/2 mile. I am going to add .1 miles per week until I'm running a flat mile. Then I can work on lowerng my time.

I haven't been doing any weight training. I'm trying to figure out how to work that in. I might not run at all two days per week and instead do weight training, and I figure I can do some push-ups before I go to bed every night... and maybe some crunches. They say it takes 21 days for something to become a habit, so I'm on my way.

Sonic is some damn good fast food. I try and stay away from it, but its so easy to stop there during lunch. I wondered why there are no Sonics up in NJ and NY, and then I realized that the more mass transit there is, the less Sonics you'll find. Since they are all drive in / drive through, there is no way to accept pedestrian traffic. Down here, if you don't have a car, you're just screwed. I'm close enough to work that I could ride a bike, but that's about all I'd be able to do.

~JL

Just Who Am I?

I saw the Inside Man tonight. Don't worry, if you haven't seen it, there are no spoilers here. I think Spike Lee definitely did his thing. Some scenes just had me saying, "Black is Beautiful" and that's because of some lessons learned in college, especially about how powerful images are.

I went to school with amazing artists who are close friends, and from them I have learned how important images are, and how they can communicate a lot more than just a picture. Unfortunately, I do not have the training to analyze or describe what I mean with the proper vocabulary, but I will try my best in a nutshell.

We see a great many negative images of Black people in the media, but that's not what I'm here to talk about. My point today is context. All images must be taken in context, which is why a picture is worth a thousand words. A Black man in handcuffs says a great deal. A Black man with a ring in his hand and his soon to be fiancee lying on the bed, says everything. I wish positive images, or contexts were able to do as much good as negative ones do bad, but that is not how it is.

I once did a report on Black advertising firms. From what I researched, I can now pick out commercials done by particular firms, just based on how Black people are being portrayed. My favorite one in particular is a Lincoln Navigator commercial, where the best man forgot the ring for the wedding and had to run out to the car and search until he found it. You don't see many Black weddings on tv, but you do see and hear a lot about single Black mothers, and many other negative associated stereotypes.

A major contributor to McDonald's success is being able to capture us while we are young. Happy meals with their toys makes McDonald's a happy experience. Once you are older, eating there is not just a matter of convenience, but perhaps the child in you wanting to taste the same food associated with "the good times." The point here is, the mind of a child is very impressionable.

Power Rangers. I was a big fan, and I'm not sure how long the craze lasted, but people my age went through the beginning of it. The original rangers, as I remember it were black, blue, pink, red, and yellow. Any major stereotypes come to mind??? Well, if you can't remember, the black ranger was Black, the blue ranger was a White male, the pink ranger was a White female, the Red ranger was an Hispanic male, and the yellow ranger was Chinese. Eventually they made some changes to fix this, but how many of us will carry those associations for the rest of our lives?

I just finished reading TAs blog, and I realized that its a wonderful thing to find your passion. I know I've spoke of this before, and that a lot of my themes seem to repeat. Anyway, I believe that our passions motivate us. Our passions ultimately define who we are, since they motivate what we do, and similarly our experiences and learnings lead to us finding our passions. Let your experieces define you... not stereotypes. Always seek to rise above and beyond what people expect of you... because people will try and keep you "in your place" but the truth is we are only limited by our own minds. And now I feel like I'm preaching. That's not my intent, but that is why blogs work a lot better for me than a diary. Everything I write turns into some sort of essay that needs an audience. If there is no audience, seems like there is no point. But I will say that blogs or any similar exercise definitely helps you understand more about yourself.

These blogs allow me to order and translate our beliefs into a common language, which ultimately allows me to relate my learnings and beliefs to others. If that is not a definition of who you are, then I don't know what is. So in essence, this blog since its start is the most accurate definition of who I am, and every entry I continue to learn more about myself, because lets face it, any individual cannot be definied in a sentence or even a paragraph. If a picture is worth a thousand words, imagine how many a lifetime is worth.

That's it for tonight. I'll be in the NY area in mid-April. Schedule is filling up fast. I'll find time for anyone who lets me know soon. I'd like to see as many as possible, but I realized today that the schedule is real tight.

~JL

Just Take A Look

Found Some Pictures.

http://www.pbase.com/clickaway/cbr

Turns out the album comes out on June 6th.

Bigger, Better entries coming soon.

~JL

Just in Severe Weather

Well, I haven't been here too long, but I just went through my first tornado. I didn't get to see anything, but maybe that's a good thing. I was watching TV and they kept interupting my shows to talk about severe weather warnings. Then they constantly had these scrolling warnings at the bottom of my screen during the show. Eventually I saw my county... then I saw my town... then it said don't wait until you can hear it, that may be too late. So I packed up, grabbed some Krispy Kremes, and got in the car. At work I always see these signs that say "Severe Weather Safe Area" so I figured that would be the best place to go.

On my way out I saw the wind was picking upm and there was lightning everywhere. I booked it over to work, parked and went inside. I didn't see anyone else there (this happened at about 9:30PM on a Sunday). I knew people were there, but I had no idea where, its a gigantic building, and the company I work for has one of the largest networks in the US with a 99.999% uptime. They have redundant network centers in tornado proof bunkers (we aren't allowed in there though). I talked on the phone with my brother for a while, and I wondered if I even needed to go there, and how long I would have to stay there. Then the announcement came from security "Severe weather in the area, please go to the center of the building." I went alone but I found another 20 or so people there... working those late Sunday hours. They were actually working, I only came to be safe from the storm. So we didn't really here anything, but the power flickered a few times... then it went out completely, emergency lights went on, and all the fire doors in the secure area shut automatically. So we were close in the core of the building. I wasn't worried because I knew it was the absolute safest place I could be. We were there for another 20 minutes, then we were given the all clear to leave. They told us which exits to avoid due to downed power lines and a possible gas leak. I went outside and found my car intact... but what I saw afterward made me very glad I decided to go to the safe area at work. I saw uprooted stop signs everywhere, and the moving barriers at the railroad crossing were also completely out of the ground.

But I'm back at my apartment now, everything is back to normal. Its weird seeing these storms though. They've been coming through for days now, this one being the most severe. Just something I'll have to get used to.

~JL

Just Deep in Thought

Here is the deep entry I promised. I have a few things I want to talk about.

#1 happened today. I went to the Arkansas DMV to get my plates and pay tax. The receptionist looked at me, took my paperwork, and said, "I have a son-in-law from Niger, which is close to Nigeria." It was a very random statement, and it was a short as I described, and it surprised me that she was trying to tell me where Niger was in relation to Nigeria. How do I respond to that? I immediately knew she was saying that because I'm black, so I explained... "That's nice. My parents are actually from the Caribbean." Understandably, that can't be told just by looking at someone, but trut is, beyond what I've been told and studied independently, I know nothing about Nigeria. Its like someone saying to you, "I have a son in Los Angeles" when you are from New York. Only thing in common is that they are both major cities. She continued by saying, "Well, we're all family, and as soon as everyone else sees it this world will be a better place."

So it made me wonder. To be absolutely honest I am very pleased with how I've been received down here. I have not had one negative experience, nor have I felt unwelcomed in any way. The numbers here for minorities are significantly lower than what I am used to, but I can't say its been any more difficult as a result. I really feel comfortable.

Today didn't change that, but I thought about it. The thing about my experiences down here that makes me feel so comfortable, is that I've been treated as everyone else. The woman today had nothing but good intentions, BUT, maybe its best, in this situation, to not say anything at all. That goes a lot further than saying something. Question of the day, is it still racism if you are treated better because of your color? Depends how you define racism. Again, she didn't have bad intentions, but I was clearly being treated better than others in line with me. She was just a lot more polite - and is it because she felt she had to be? Was she concerned with how I, or black people in general think of white people? I don't know, but to answer the question of the day, in order for racism to be out of the picture, preferential treatment has to be put aside - and that relates just to how you are being treated. I'm not applying that to programs such as Affirmative Action because the purpose of that is to increase minority presence in certain areas (education and the workplace) so that it isn't a big deal when you see a minority, as I experienced today.

#2 is a developing story. I usually don't like talking about this subject until there is something to talk about, but I will be abstract enough, yet give you enough to follow along.

Two weekends ago, I met a group of people (I think I mentioned them a bfew blogs ago). They are cool, we went to the college town, and then to IHOP. One of the girls was in my orientation class at work. I forgot her name (I'm really bad with names), but luckily it came up in conversation later that night. Anyway, that's all the background you need. Last weekend, her friends were out of town, so it was just me and her around to hang out. We went to the movies, and then to IHOP. At the end of the night, she invited me to church, so Sunday I picked her up and we went. After church, (here is where it gets interesting) she invites me over for something to eat. Apparently she makes her food on Sunday morning and uses it for lunch the rest of the week (it wasn't all on my behalf). But I went by her place and she put a plate together for me. I really appreciated that.

Well, here is something about me, see I've been cruising along the past 22 years with some bad eating habits. I don't eat vegetables. I've tried, I can't stand them, and as far as being mature goes, its pretty much the most immature thing about me - because I just don't do it. I asked her what she prepared and she said "Chicken Spaghetti." Sounds good to me, those are two things I definitely eat. She described it.

Spaghetti - I'm cool with that
Chicken - Sounds good
Cheese - Mmmmm
Diced Tomatoes - uh oh
Side of Green Beans - Hmmmm

So I'm sitting in the couch as she prepared the plate, thinking to myself. "Dammit, you knew this day was coming. You're going to eat some vegetables, and you're gonna like it." Now I don't know anyone who can turn down free food, so I didn't. I ate a good amount (about half). I'm not going to say what I did to get out of the rest. Now the most I've ate for a woman before is a few green beans and a small piece of zuchinni. While what I did on Sunday wasn't noticeably impressive to her, that's the most vegeatbles I've had probably in about 20 years. Is it an affirmation of commitment because she gave me free food (and we had a good time together)? Or was it because its free food? We'll see.

I'll leave you with a quote from Martin.

"Martin if you want to punk out right now you can... because sometimes it takes a big man to run like a little girl." - Martin's radio manager as Martin is about to start a boxing match with a professional boxer.

~JL

Just Live a Little

I know it's been a while. Haven't had much to talk about. I'm here glued to 24. They gave me two hours tonight. It was a bad night for CTU... very bad.

I was watching Martin earlier today and I have a classic scene from the episode when he though his friends took his CD player.

HOLD UP!
HOLD UP!
HOLD UP!
NO! NO! NO!
Brotha Man, its not a good time, what's up?

-Nothin man, just chillin', lookin' for some Jello.

Brotha man, come on, get your boots and roll out.

-Almost forgot, thanks for letting me borrow your CD player... it was all that.

Whoa, you want to run that by me again brotha man?

-Yeah, I borrowed it the other night. You didn't get the note I left you under your bathroom sink?

That is the dumbest thing I ever... why would you leave a note under my bathroom sink Brotha man?

-I figured you would look there since I used up all the toilet paper.

______________________
Nah, I'm not a couch potato... but jobs do that to you. I come home, and I do nothing. Work doesn't stress me or anything, I just like doing nothing when I get home... its a big contrast from getting home from class and having to keep working until early morning. I am going to get back on the biz plan though. I've been lazy with it because this idea doesn't need as much startup capital as the original ideas, and therefore, the plan is just for my use, not to sell to anyone or for raising capital. I'll have a deeper entry soon. Got to live a little bit more first.

~JL

Just Let the Album drop

Update from the UK. My cousin's album was released yesterday. Apparently her latest single is officially at the top of the charts. Guess who it passed to reach number one??? Madonna!. That's big. I'm a proud cousin. Helps put things into perspective - this is a really big deal, even if it is 5000 miles away.

The album comes out here on March 7th (I think). For those who want to hear some samples first, go to her website www.corinnebaileyrae.net or even better, go to the iTunes music store, and switch it to the UK version (at the bottom of the main page). She comes up immediately in the top left. Learn the name well, even though british artists have trouble breaking into the US market, it worked (briefly) for Craig David, and we all know Floetry is still around... I expect big things from her. As much as I knock record companies, her's is doing an extremely good job.

That's what is on my mind. I doubt she reads this, but all I would say to her is to enjoy the success. I know that music is something she loves, and that is apparent through her music and its a big reason why its being received so well. I hope the fame that comes with it doesn't do anything to change music from being something she loves to do.

~JL