Just Deep in Thought
Here is the deep entry I promised. I have a few things I want to talk about.
#1 happened today. I went to the Arkansas DMV to get my plates and pay tax. The receptionist looked at me, took my paperwork, and said, "I have a son-in-law from Niger, which is close to Nigeria." It was a very random statement, and it was a short as I described, and it surprised me that she was trying to tell me where Niger was in relation to Nigeria. How do I respond to that? I immediately knew she was saying that because I'm black, so I explained... "That's nice. My parents are actually from the Caribbean." Understandably, that can't be told just by looking at someone, but trut is, beyond what I've been told and studied independently, I know nothing about Nigeria. Its like someone saying to you, "I have a son in Los Angeles" when you are from New York. Only thing in common is that they are both major cities. She continued by saying, "Well, we're all family, and as soon as everyone else sees it this world will be a better place."
So it made me wonder. To be absolutely honest I am very pleased with how I've been received down here. I have not had one negative experience, nor have I felt unwelcomed in any way. The numbers here for minorities are significantly lower than what I am used to, but I can't say its been any more difficult as a result. I really feel comfortable.
Today didn't change that, but I thought about it. The thing about my experiences down here that makes me feel so comfortable, is that I've been treated as everyone else. The woman today had nothing but good intentions, BUT, maybe its best, in this situation, to not say anything at all. That goes a lot further than saying something. Question of the day, is it still racism if you are treated better because of your color? Depends how you define racism. Again, she didn't have bad intentions, but I was clearly being treated better than others in line with me. She was just a lot more polite - and is it because she felt she had to be? Was she concerned with how I, or black people in general think of white people? I don't know, but to answer the question of the day, in order for racism to be out of the picture, preferential treatment has to be put aside - and that relates just to how you are being treated. I'm not applying that to programs such as Affirmative Action because the purpose of that is to increase minority presence in certain areas (education and the workplace) so that it isn't a big deal when you see a minority, as I experienced today.
#2 is a developing story. I usually don't like talking about this subject until there is something to talk about, but I will be abstract enough, yet give you enough to follow along.
Two weekends ago, I met a group of people (I think I mentioned them a bfew blogs ago). They are cool, we went to the college town, and then to IHOP. One of the girls was in my orientation class at work. I forgot her name (I'm really bad with names), but luckily it came up in conversation later that night. Anyway, that's all the background you need. Last weekend, her friends were out of town, so it was just me and her around to hang out. We went to the movies, and then to IHOP. At the end of the night, she invited me to church, so Sunday I picked her up and we went. After church, (here is where it gets interesting) she invites me over for something to eat. Apparently she makes her food on Sunday morning and uses it for lunch the rest of the week (it wasn't all on my behalf). But I went by her place and she put a plate together for me. I really appreciated that.
Well, here is something about me, see I've been cruising along the past 22 years with some bad eating habits. I don't eat vegetables. I've tried, I can't stand them, and as far as being mature goes, its pretty much the most immature thing about me - because I just don't do it. I asked her what she prepared and she said "Chicken Spaghetti." Sounds good to me, those are two things I definitely eat. She described it.
Spaghetti - I'm cool with that
Chicken - Sounds good
Cheese - Mmmmm
Diced Tomatoes - uh oh
Side of Green Beans - Hmmmm
So I'm sitting in the couch as she prepared the plate, thinking to myself. "Dammit, you knew this day was coming. You're going to eat some vegetables, and you're gonna like it." Now I don't know anyone who can turn down free food, so I didn't. I ate a good amount (about half). I'm not going to say what I did to get out of the rest. Now the most I've ate for a woman before is a few green beans and a small piece of zuchinni. While what I did on Sunday wasn't noticeably impressive to her, that's the most vegeatbles I've had probably in about 20 years. Is it an affirmation of commitment because she gave me free food (and we had a good time together)? Or was it because its free food? We'll see.
I'll leave you with a quote from Martin.
"Martin if you want to punk out right now you can... because sometimes it takes a big man to run like a little girl." - Martin's radio manager as Martin is about to start a boxing match with a professional boxer.
~JL
#1 happened today. I went to the Arkansas DMV to get my plates and pay tax. The receptionist looked at me, took my paperwork, and said, "I have a son-in-law from Niger, which is close to Nigeria." It was a very random statement, and it was a short as I described, and it surprised me that she was trying to tell me where Niger was in relation to Nigeria. How do I respond to that? I immediately knew she was saying that because I'm black, so I explained... "That's nice. My parents are actually from the Caribbean." Understandably, that can't be told just by looking at someone, but trut is, beyond what I've been told and studied independently, I know nothing about Nigeria. Its like someone saying to you, "I have a son in Los Angeles" when you are from New York. Only thing in common is that they are both major cities. She continued by saying, "Well, we're all family, and as soon as everyone else sees it this world will be a better place."
So it made me wonder. To be absolutely honest I am very pleased with how I've been received down here. I have not had one negative experience, nor have I felt unwelcomed in any way. The numbers here for minorities are significantly lower than what I am used to, but I can't say its been any more difficult as a result. I really feel comfortable.
Today didn't change that, but I thought about it. The thing about my experiences down here that makes me feel so comfortable, is that I've been treated as everyone else. The woman today had nothing but good intentions, BUT, maybe its best, in this situation, to not say anything at all. That goes a lot further than saying something. Question of the day, is it still racism if you are treated better because of your color? Depends how you define racism. Again, she didn't have bad intentions, but I was clearly being treated better than others in line with me. She was just a lot more polite - and is it because she felt she had to be? Was she concerned with how I, or black people in general think of white people? I don't know, but to answer the question of the day, in order for racism to be out of the picture, preferential treatment has to be put aside - and that relates just to how you are being treated. I'm not applying that to programs such as Affirmative Action because the purpose of that is to increase minority presence in certain areas (education and the workplace) so that it isn't a big deal when you see a minority, as I experienced today.
#2 is a developing story. I usually don't like talking about this subject until there is something to talk about, but I will be abstract enough, yet give you enough to follow along.
Two weekends ago, I met a group of people (I think I mentioned them a bfew blogs ago). They are cool, we went to the college town, and then to IHOP. One of the girls was in my orientation class at work. I forgot her name (I'm really bad with names), but luckily it came up in conversation later that night. Anyway, that's all the background you need. Last weekend, her friends were out of town, so it was just me and her around to hang out. We went to the movies, and then to IHOP. At the end of the night, she invited me to church, so Sunday I picked her up and we went. After church, (here is where it gets interesting) she invites me over for something to eat. Apparently she makes her food on Sunday morning and uses it for lunch the rest of the week (it wasn't all on my behalf). But I went by her place and she put a plate together for me. I really appreciated that.
Well, here is something about me, see I've been cruising along the past 22 years with some bad eating habits. I don't eat vegetables. I've tried, I can't stand them, and as far as being mature goes, its pretty much the most immature thing about me - because I just don't do it. I asked her what she prepared and she said "Chicken Spaghetti." Sounds good to me, those are two things I definitely eat. She described it.
Spaghetti - I'm cool with that
Chicken - Sounds good
Cheese - Mmmmm
Diced Tomatoes - uh oh
Side of Green Beans - Hmmmm
So I'm sitting in the couch as she prepared the plate, thinking to myself. "Dammit, you knew this day was coming. You're going to eat some vegetables, and you're gonna like it." Now I don't know anyone who can turn down free food, so I didn't. I ate a good amount (about half). I'm not going to say what I did to get out of the rest. Now the most I've ate for a woman before is a few green beans and a small piece of zuchinni. While what I did on Sunday wasn't noticeably impressive to her, that's the most vegeatbles I've had probably in about 20 years. Is it an affirmation of commitment because she gave me free food (and we had a good time together)? Or was it because its free food? We'll see.
I'll leave you with a quote from Martin.
"Martin if you want to punk out right now you can... because sometimes it takes a big man to run like a little girl." - Martin's radio manager as Martin is about to start a boxing match with a professional boxer.
~JL
posted by JC at 6:46 PM
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